Speak No Evil...
The words we use every day have a direct impact on how we think about things, and consequently our general outlook on life. Consider the following quote:
Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.
Our language also directly affects others, in both good and bad ways. Words can be helpful and encouraging, but sometimes they can be aggressive, judgmental, or even downright mean. A lot has to do with the context in which they are used, and sometimes their meaning can get lost in translation. We can be quick to dole out phrases that might not have the intended effect, leaving others to interpret them as they will. It is often times this grey area of interpretation that leaves us open to misunderstandings.
Communication is one of the most important tools a superintendent has, but wielded carelessly it can have negative consequences. Talking with staff, management and golfers affords us the opportunity to convey our message clearly and concisely. Being mindful of our speech can help us to avoid misunderstandings and keep the lines of communication running smoothly.
I have compiled a short list of words and phrases that I am personally trying to avoid... It would be valuable for you to make up a list of your own.
- Can't - This is one I discourage my kids from using. Using the word cant implies that something is not possible. Instead try, I have not learned how yet
- Impossible - Just think of all the things that you have seen in this world that have taken your breath away. Now think about all of the things we have accomplished as a species that our ancestors would have deemed impossible. Nothing is impossible, we just haven't figured out how to do it yet.
- Should - This one is subtle, but when we use this word constantly we imply judgment. If everyone else should be doing things, it really means that they should' be doing things the way we think they should be done.
- Normal - What the heck does this word mean anyway? What is normal to me may be absolutely absurd to you. Nothing creative or ground breaking ever came from anything 'normal'.
- Try - In the immortal words of Jedi master Yoda, 'Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try.' If we are only going to try, then we are setting ourselves up for failure. Commit to doing something or don't bother starting.
- Don't worry about it - Last time I checked, worrying about something does not make it any better. By using this phrase constantly, worry becomes part of your being. Let go of worry all together and forget about the word. Instead maybe try one I heard from a Harry Potter movie: 'Don't you think on it.'
- Swearing - This one is particularly tough when we are mid season. The sailors language is pretty common within the turf world, but no one ever suffered from cutting back on the f-bombs. Not saying that you have to give it up completely, just start by noticing how much you may resort to swearing to fill in the blanks.
- Gossip - If your course is anything like mine, gossip and stories grow larger and more foolish the more they are told. Try to rise above it all and just opt out of storytelling. Usually we only hear half of the original story, and by retelling it we lose a bit more. The old adage; Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt comes to mind.
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