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About this blog

Randy and the gang at Rockbottum Country Club pontificate on Rockbottum wisdom and skeletal golf, among other madness.

Entries in this blog

The Unbalanced Superintendent

Are you unbalanced?  Many superintendents I have met are slightly misaligned, due to an almost evangelical devotion to career.   Some are unaware of how many hours they spend at the course and require some kind of trauma to get back on the family track.  This can include the children failing to recognize their father and mistakenly calling the UPS guy "Daddy".     For me, it was Claire identifying me as an "intruder" for the police.  (She had apparently changed the locks sometime during the
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

1

Rockbottum Rules

Rockbottum Country Club has enjoyed tremendous success, because Rockbottum Rules.   We follow a flexible approach built on years of experience gained as a family of superintendents, pro golfers and bad golf course architecture fixers.     For instance, Rule #1:  We offer weekday walker fees of $10 for 18 holes.  At this price range we don't hear any complaints and we rarely have anyone take us up on the price because most golfers are far too lazy to walk.   Rule #2:  We offer a form of Neo
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Buddy and the Village Idiot

Buddy is a former equipment tech, assistant superintendent, hot rod builder and extra on 'Dallas'.   He was also a fairly capable producer/director until . . . the incident you are about to see.  Nowadays, Buddy refuses to appear on set unless the wrangler has a tranquilizer gun.      
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Actual Member/Homeowner Comments

In support of Tim Bryant's most interesting thread on the TN Forum, "Things You Have Learned", we offer the following collection of actual, true-story comments, suggestions and advice:   These little bits of wisdom were documented by TN members, our crew and one famous superintendent with really great hair.  
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

4

Brilliant Career Advice!

To avoid winning the Darwinian Natural Selection Award, widen your skill range and harden up, because times are changing.   Here at the Rock, we are adapting to the evolving environment of modern golf by abandoning our loose, irreverent style and becoming more intellectual.  (I even bought a tweed jacket with leather elbow patches and a Meerschaum pipe.)   Please watch the first intellectual film in our Brilliant Career Advice series.  
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Wheat Belly vs The Walmartians

Rockbottum University has been studying Wheat Belly for months now and we are prepared to release our premature findings.  The primary researcher/test subject, (me) is a gifted dietary adjustment genius with heavy experience in food crazes, exercise addiction and nutrition conspiracies.    I inherited this disorder from my dad, Norm, a former paratrooper/golf pro/CGCS with a maniacal fixation on diets, vitamins and health supplements dating back to 1964.  Our family regimen involved ingestio
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Opinion Based Pseudo-Science Nonsense

John Reitman's article on the front page of TurfNet is an absolute must-read for anyone in the golf business.   Once again, we have been savaged by the pretend eco-warriors and painted as pesticide-soaked earth molesters.  The time has come to be more animated in our response to propaganda, to adamantly present our positive environmental image to mainstream media.   We need to be more like Anthony Williams and Mark Hoban . . . aggressive environmental action heroes.  We must not allow these
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Drone Use on Golf Courses

The camera platform known in current terms as a "Drone" has more potential than just another way to indulge in Metallica driven action videos.   In the following training film, Buddy explains other ways to utilize the Drone.    
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

1

How To Avoid The Bad Foot

I hate bad shoes.  My brother Mike was almost killed by bad shoes.  His after school job selling women's shoes sometimes required him to force size 4 high heels onto size 12 hooves.  One simple detonation could fling shrapnel and clouds of compressed foot gas all over the mall.        I hate bad socks more than bad shoes.  I was almost killed by bad socks.  I remember a particularly grueling 12 mile ruck march in the Ozarks--complete with howling winds and snow--when I ran out of moleskin at m
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

4

Do You Hear Voices?

I have this voice stuck in my head.  It talks to me every day on the course.  Buddy says if I retire it will go away.  I don't know how much more I can take . . .    
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Chainsaw Safety--Guaranteed!

With the recent high profile chainsaw accidents involving Greg Norman and Peter McCormick, it might be time for Mickey McCord to devote an entire training series to chainsaw safety.  While we're waiting on Mickey, I'll reveal the Three Rules of Absolute Chainsaw Safety.   My entire GCS career was based on the chainsaw.  The only golf courses that would hire me were the courses in trouble and they were in trouble because of trees--and bad business practices--but mostly trees.  The previous supe
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

1

Cat Calendar Conspiracy

A couple of years ago, we released a short film about the insidious movement to replace the TurfNet Dog Calendar--The First and Still Champion Golf Course Dog Calendar--with a more diversified version.   Our film was suppressed by a relentless campaign of modern PC brainwashing, using guilt to claim less fortunate animals on the golf course were being ignored.   Quote . . . a conspiracy to force TurfNet to add cats Brian Nettz led a push for the inclusion of goats, Mark Hoban advocated a
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

3

I Have Acquiesced

This is a confession:  I have been the curmudgeonly, gruff old guy relentlessly holding on to the traditional, classic elements of golf.  I have resisted the latest trends, marketing fads and new technology since the appearance of the golf cart.  I fought the insanity of growing bent in The South, battled real estate course design, azalea overdose and the maniacal pursuit of stripes, checkerboards and argyle patterns burnt into bermuda choking overseed in lines so straight that astronauts notice
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

8

Straight Talk and Common Sense, Mike Young--Part One

Mike Young is a golf course architect gifted with a realistic view of the golf business and a straightforward manner guaranteed to make the various alphabet organizations uncomfortable.   Mike's common sense approach will be familiar to a number of TurfNet members who lean toward a pragmatic, grass-roots sensibility in dealing with the current hysteria surrounding the health of golf.   "Straight Talk and Common Sense" is a Rockbottum CC series aimed at countering the storm of ad agency propa
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Magic Vanishing Topdressing, Concrete Biscuits

In this short film, Mark Hoban discusses test plots and Elly May biscuits.   Robert Womac of Golf Agronomics drops by to educate me about invisible topdressing and also knocks Ken Mangum off his "Best Hair In The Golf Industry" throne.
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Rockbottum: Ten Years From Now

The loudest voice in my head is MGP, or The Mad Golf Prophet.   Occasionally he forces his way to my frontal lobe, demanding that I deliver his current prediction or he will do something crazy.  As usual, I foolishly ignored him and then watched in horror as he made good on his threat.    MGP ruthlessly terrorized a foursome of Foot-Golfers by collapsing on the turf, writhing in agony and clutching clearly undamaged body parts.    After a few seconds of near-death, MGP suddenly hopped up a
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Censored '09 TN News Video Resurfaces!

We intentionally buried this news program deep in the dungeon vault after numerous threats from committee members and our accountant, but we have experienced a sudden inexplicable desire to "tell it all, brethren, tell it all".   Or it could be the effects of a week of fly-fishing in the NC mountains, drinking an exquisite beer called "Dirt Wolf" and our new film isn't ready yet.      
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

0

Fred Gehrisch, CGCS, IM (Idea Man)

Highlands Falls CC, deep in the rugged mountains of western North Carolina, is like a fairy tale golf course.  It's almost too beautiful to be real, the layout is gentle and inviting and the inhabitants of this enchanted rain forest are far too pleasant for country club members.   The air is special here, at just over 4,000 feet, and standing amidst the firs, spruces and rhododendrons, it's hard to tell what is natural and what is intensively manicured.  Noisy mountain streams, towering hemloc
Randy Wilson

Randy Wilson

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