We live in a world that thrives on judgment and opinion. These often harmful habits were amplified during the pandemic and have only grown stronger since then. Many people have retreated to their corners and are refusing to come out, stuck fast in the belief that their take is the right one.  World leaders serve us daily rhetoric that only serves to fuel a deepening a sense of division and further their own agendas. Then there is social media. Via our devices, the algorithms drip feed a constant dose of what we want to hear, sealing us off from alternative viewpoints and only strengthening our own sense of righteousness.

Internally, many of us live our lives from a place of constant judgment and opinion. We spend a great deal of time and mental energy lining ourselves up against “the norm”, feeling that we are falling short and constantly striving to make up the difference somehow. We create stories that become our internal narrative about the way things are, and feed these stories instead of questioning their validity. We inadvertently maintain the status quo this way. There is a strange and quieting comfort when we are quite certain about things. It means we don’t have to push any boundaries or step out of our comfort zones. We can stay safely tucked away in our own little bubble, content to live our lives judging ourselves and everything around us without any self examination or any drive to challenge ourselves towards betterment.

Let’s pause and think of our own industry for a moment. The ruinous nature of our work lives being constantly fueled by external expectations and endless comparison are form of judgment, but what often stands out the most is how we stay glued to “the way things have always been done”. The reasons for our willingness to maintain the status quo in this way can be varied; they can be market driven, there may be real limitations at your particular facility, or it may even originate from a simple fear of change. Whatever the reason, there are many properties that collectively resist change and innovation just because it’s more comfortable to live in ignorance.

And yet there’s another way forward and through. It‘s rooted in a less rigid and more playful quality of being… It’s curiosity.

On the golf course, when we begin to be curious we start to form better questions. Whether it concerns our cultural practices, leadership strategies, or even our own personal work patterns, questioning the status quo can reveal so very much. When we open our minds to alternative explanations, learning and unlearning occur spontaneously. Seeking to answer these new queries leads us to measure and quantify things differently, leading us to see our old worn out practices in an entirely new light.

...when we begin to be curious we start to form better questions.

Think of all that we held as sacrosanct twenty years ago. Where would we be if someone hadn’t challenged the prevailing opinions and asked better questions? The list of new, alternative initiatives and perspectives has been staggering.  From cultural practices, fertility and moisture management, hiring practices and flexibility in work arrangements, new data collection practices, expanded learning and leadership development, the long overdue recognition of gender and diversity inclusivity, and even some guy talking about the importance of mindfulness and taking care of ourselves! The list is almost endless and none of it would have been possible if someone hadn’t paused and become curious. 

When we, as a society, bring a mindset of curiosity to wider cultural divisions, funny things start to happen here as well. We realize that we are all far more similar than we’ve been lead to believe. As a species our fundamental needs are the same. We all want to be happy, to feel like we belong, and most importantly, to be loved. Curiosity allows us to break down long held opinions and stereotypes and begin to ask deeper questions of ourselves and those around us.

As we do so we begin to see through the thin veneer of our stories, and realize that many of our ingrained habits and patterns no longer serve us well. We begin to see that all of our deeply held opinions weren’t ours to begin with. Just a bunch of ideas that accumulated over time which we had convinced ourselves were important and true.

We begin to see that all of our deeply held opinions weren’t ours to begin with...

As we begin to view ourselves through a different lens, we also begin to connect on a deeper level with those around us. We come to see our common humanity by realizing that our suffering is not unique, and that we share many of the same issues with our broader communities. This realization inevitably leads to less opinion, less comparison, and less judgment. Instead we embrace a newfound sense of compassion and understanding.

Judgment contains us. 

Opinions cut us off from possibility. 

Comparison only serves to limit us. 

Expectations fuel anxiety and lead us further away from ourselves. 

Curiosity opens us to new perspectives. It fuels creativity and innovation. It reminds us that there is elegance in simplicity. It shows us that we need not seek to divide or conquer, but rather mend and heal. It shows us who we really are… and that, in the end, is such a gift.

Thanks for reading.