This blogging thing just keeps getting better. The more I write, the more I read and the more I stumble upon your stories. It might get to the point soon where I simply post your writing; it's that good.

The Maestro sent me a link to a blog post by Adam Garr, superintendent at Plum Hollow Country Club in Southfield, Michigan. Adam was plugging away like the rest of us, but about a year ago he had an epiphany that changed how he not only does his job, but how he lives his life.

The original post that lead to Adam's awakening can be found here: The Cost of Being Super. Adam had found himself at a point in his career when things were really humming professionally.

You must be committed to what you're doing, and you must believe in yourself and get your staff to believe in you. You must be the hardest working guy on staff, and lead by example.

Unfortunately, like many of us, Adam was not achieving a work-life balance as well as he might have been. Things were as good as they could be at the course, but were slowly falling apart at home.

He wrote, "I have missed birthday celebrations, weekend trips up north, weddings, barbecues, and sporting events because the course called to me louder than my family. Other times I came home so tired, I was virtually useless around the house. This loss of balance catches up to you over time, wears on you, wears harder on those around you, and eventually it forces you to take notice that something is missing."

About a year later Adam followed the original post with an update: A Super Life. Thankfully things have turned around for both Adam and his family, and he is slowly approaching the balance we all seek.

"...now when I leave the course I usually go straight home and put my full effort into being husband and father.  Just last week, I snuck out early and watched my youngest graduate pre-school.  A year ago, I probably would have missed it because I was 'too busy'.  The smile on her face when I walked in told me I had made the right decision."

So what is it that makes us fall into the trap of sacrificing our personal lives for this job? I think that its the same thing that fuels the 'corner table culture' that we all despise...just a different version. Its our ego. Not in the sense that we are walking around with our chests puffed out, but more so that we are living from a place that puts our accolades, our sense of purpose, and our professional lives ahead of everything else.

The job of a superintendent can be a long, hard road sometimes, but when it's good it's like a drug.

When the praise is being heaped on you, you find yourself wanting to be there more and more.

Praise and criticism are two sides of the same sword. Grasp either one too tightly and you're liable to end up bleeding. If we live out of that ego place, then praise and criticism take on greater value than we should grant them. They can begin to seem like matters of life and death to us.

When things go wrong (which they always do eventually), we take it too personally and it drains us. Then we strive and grasp to make things right again. We get so wrapped up in the ups and downs of the course that we have nothing left to give when we get home. That is not only unfair to our loved ones, but it is especially unfair to ourselves.

When we step outside of the ego perspective we then have the space we need to see through all of the superficial stuff that can make us feel as though we are being dragged through the end of an irrigation hose. Like Adam, we can see what is important both on the golf course and at home and set our priorities accordingly. We can still dream big, aim for the stars and work hard, we just do it while being mindful of what we give the bulk of our energies to. When we concern ourselves less with getting caught up in praise or critiques we have more energy to give towards what is truly irreplaceable: our personal well being.